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30 Funny St. Patrick’s Day Jokes and Comics

Even if you remember to wear green on March 17, you’ll still get a “pinch” of humor from these funny St. Patrick’s Day jokes submitted by Scout Life readers.

Do you know a funny St. Patrick’s Day joke? Click here to send your joke to us.

stpatjokes-550


DOWNLOAD A FREE POCKET JOKE BOOK!

Print and fold your own pocket joke book, filled with great St. Patrick’s Day jokes!
Download the joke book (PDF)
Folding instructions


Tom: What do you get when you cross a four-leaf clover with poison ivy?
Pee Wee: I don’t know.
Tom: A rash of good luck on St. Patrick’s Day.

Joke submitted by Tommy F., Aberdeen, Md.
Comic by Daryll Collins


Seth: What do you call a fake Irish stone?
Spencer: What?
Seth: A shamrock!

Joke submitted by Seth F., Frederick, Colo.


nickelcomic-1

Comic by Scott Nickel


David: Mom, I met an Irish boy on St. Patrick’s Day.
Mom: Oh, really?
David: No, O’Reilly!

Joke submitted by David K., Shelby Township, Mich.


Katelynn: What did the leprechaun say when the video game ended?
Molly: What?
Katelynn: Game clover!

Joke submitted by Katelynn E., Lexington, Ky.


Comic by Scott Nickel


Joe: Why shouldn’t you iron a four-leaf clover?
Bob: Tell me.
Joe: You might press your luck!

Joke submitted by Eric H., San Diego, Calif.


Sean: What happens if you fall in the Irish Sea on St. Patrick’s Day?
David: No idea.
Sean: You get wet!

Joke submitted by Sean D., Falls Church, Va.


patrick-2

Comic by Scott Nickel


Jack: On what musical instrument did the show-off musician play his St. Patrick’s Day tunes?
Ally: I have no idea.
Jack: On his brag-pipes.

Joke submitted by Jacqueline S., Moline, Ill.


Danni: Knock. Knock.
Izzy: Who’s there?
Danni: Warren.
Izzy: Warren who?
Danni: Warren any green today?

Joke submitted by Danni L., Memphis, Tenn.


Comic by Scott Nickel


Keenan: What do you call leprechauns who collect aluminum cans, used newspapers and plastic bottles?
Liam: What?
Keenan: “Wee-cyclers!”

Joke submitted by Jacqueline S., Moline, Ill.


Tim: How can you tell if a leprechaun likes your joke?
Rob: How?
Tim: He’s Dublin over with laughter!

Joke submitted by Tim S., Biloxi, Miss.


patrick-3

Comic by Scott Nickel


Jon: How can you tell if a potato is not from Ireland?
Sami: Not sure.
Jon: When it’s a French fry.

Joke submitted by Jon J., Redland, Calif.


Ian: Where do leprechauns buy their groceries?
Colin: I don’t know.
Ian: Rainbow Foods!

Joke submitted by Ian C., Minneapolis, Minn.


Comic by Daryll Collins


Peyton: What did the leprechaun say on March 17?
Cody: I dunno.
Peyton: “Irish you a Happy St. Patrick’s Day!”

Joke submitted by Andy K., Perkasie, Pa.


Jamie: Why did St. Patrick drive all the snakes out of Ireland?
Ashley: Why?
Jamie: Airplanes weren’t invented yet.

Joke submitted by Jamie M., Plantation, Fla.


nickelcomic-2

Comic by Scott Nickel


Carrot: Knock, knock.
Potato: Who’s there?
Carrot: Irish stew.
Potato: Irish stew, who?
Carrot: Irish stew in the name of the law.

Joke submitted by J.S., Hayward, Calif.


Mike: What does a leprechaun say when you tell him Bono is his favorite singer?
Misty: Tell me.
Mike: You too?

Joke submitted by Mike M., Omaha, Neb.


Comic by Daryll Collins


Evan: What’s Irish and stays out all night?
Steffan: What?
Evan: Paddy O’Furniture.

Joke submitted by Evan R., Wylie, Tex.


Will: What’s big and purple and lies next to Ireland?
Cody: No clue.
Will: Grape Britain!

Joke submitted by Will C., Laramie, Wyo.


patrick-1

Comic by Scott Nickel


Steph: Why do people wear shamrocks on St. Patrick’s Day?
Jak: Why?
Steph: ‘Cause real rocks are too heavy!

Joke submitted by Steph O., El Paso, Tex.


Alexis: What do you call Dwayne Johnson’s stunt double?
Zack: What?
Alexis: The Sham-Rock!

Joke submitted by Alexis J., Margate, Fla.


Comic by Scott Nickel


Mika: What did the baby leprechaun find at the end of the rainbow?
Will: A pot of gold?
Mika: No, a Potty Gold!

Joke submitted by Mika C., Las Vegas, Nev.


Ella: What did Saint Patrick say when he drove all the snakes out of Ireland?
Bella: I don’t know.
Ella: “Everyone got seat belts on back there?”

Joke submitted by Ella C., Topeka, Kan.


DOWNLOAD A FREE POCKET JOKE BOOK!

Print and fold your own pocket joke book, filled with great St. Patrick’s Day jokes!
Download the joke book (PDF)
Folding instructions


Do you know a funny St. Patrick’s Day joke? Click here to send your joke to us.

45 Comments on 30 Funny St. Patrick’s Day Jokes and Comics

  1. best jokes

  2. very funny but very interesting

  3. I love jokes // March 15, 2021 at 9:42 pm // Reply

    What? I love these

  4. real cool. I want you to make more!

  5. Davemasterofcool // March 13, 2021 at 7:24 pm // Reply

    Such funny

  6. bill nye the science guy // March 11, 2021 at 12:01 pm // Reply

    i like the jokes i hope you make more

  7. Animelover13 // March 9, 2021 at 11:24 am // Reply

    I love these jokes i even used them for my class!~

  8. Love the jokes so funny😍😘❤️😍💕

  9. These jokes cracked me up which made me laugh so hard 😅

  10. it was funny

  11. Thanks for the fun jokes to share with my family. Good happy laughs.

  12. Loganoneil // March 17, 2020 at 7:48 am // Reply

    It was funny and cool

  13. Love these jokes

  14. none of your buisness // March 2, 2020 at 9:48 am // Reply

    funny

  15. I don’t know which one to pick for my school newsletter!:😍:)

  16. GabeTheAngel2019 // May 3, 2019 at 5:44 pm // Reply

    Love everything! I am pretty Irish (don’t know how much).

  17. Yikes they really need an explanation? Lol

  18. I LOVE THESE JOKES

  19. I get it

  20. these are so funny

  21. I like it really much 👍

  22. I got all the jokes, but i’m 51% Irish!

  23. AWESOME!

  24. the best one was the one with yoda!

  25. I got the last two but it took me awile

    HA

  26. cool

  27. Ally_cat 027 // March 17, 2017 at 9:04 am // Reply

    I only got two of them

  28. Thelegeng27 // March 16, 2017 at 4:55 pm // Reply

    Lol these jokes cracked me up

  29. Irish Babe // March 9, 2017 at 5:17 pm // Reply

    ME either!

  30. These jokes are all worthy of “Boys Life”
    .

  31. I thought Paddy O’Furniture was Irish and sits in the sun….

  32. The last two jokes

    Irish stew,……………..I arrest you
    Paddy O’Furniture………..Patio furniture

  33. YYAAYYY!!!!!!

  34. I don’t understand the last two😮

  35. thank very much

  36. The Jokester // March 11, 2015 at 7:51 pm // Reply

    These are really funny jokes, I loled for 7 days

  37. Silly

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