60 Funny Cat Jokes and Comics

Here are 60 funny cat jokes and comics by Scout Life readers that will make you howl with laughter. Do you know any funny cat jokes? Click here to send them to us. You could earn a patch if we publish your joke!

Once you’re done laughing at these cat jokes, visit jokes.scoutlife.org for thousands more funny jokes.

Comic by Scott Nickel

Two robins stuffed themselves with worms until they were too fat to fly. Since the birds couldn’t go anywhere, they decided to just sit and soak up the sun.

Along came a cat, and it ate them.

Licking its paws, the cat said, “I just love baskin’ robins!”

Submitted by Johnny K., Broken Arrow, Okla.

Mom No. 1: How do you get your sleepy-head son up in the morning?
Mom No. 2: I just put the cat on the bed.
Mom No. 1: How does that help?
Mom No. 2: The dog’s already there.

Submitted by Stephen C., Salem, Va.

Comic by Scott Nickel

Adam: Who delivers presents to cats?
Jim: Who?
Adam: Santa Claws!

Submitted by Adam M., Kansas City, Mo.

Matt: Knock, knock.
Jake: Who’s there?
Matt: Kitten.
Jake: Kitten, who?
Matt: Quit kitten around and open the door!

Submitted by Joshua P., Brighton, Mich.

Comic by Scott Nickel

Caleb: What do you call a cat that bowls?
John: I don’t know.
Caleb: An alley cat!

Submitted by Caleb D.

Bob: How do you make a cat happy?
Bill: I don’t know.
Bob: Send it to the Canary Islands!

Submitted by Drew B., McMinnville, Ore.

Comic by Scott Nickel

Sterling: What’s a cat’s favorite game?
Cooper: What?
Sterling: Mouse Trap.

Submitted by Sterling P., La Jolla, Calif.

Ethan: What’s a cat’s favorite color?
John: What is it?
Ethan: Purrr-ple!

Submitted by Ethan C., Huntersville, N.C.

Comic by Harley Schwadron

Gerik: Why do you have to be careful when it rains cats and dogs?
Derek: I don’t know.
Gerik: So you don’t step in a poodle!

Submitted by Gerik M., Nevada City, Calif.

Charlie: What do you call a dishonest African cat?
Thomas: I have no idea.
Charlie: A “lyin’ cub.”

Submitted by Matthew K., Ellicott City, Md.

Comic by Scott Nickel

Will: What do you get when you cross an angry cat with a famous painter?
Willow: I haven’t the foggiest.
Will: Clawed Monet!

Submitted by Willow P., Hartfield, Va.

George: What do cats say when they get hurt?
Jeff: Tell me.
George: “Me-OW!”

Submitted by George Y., San Ramon, Calif.

Comic by Scott Masear

Nathan: Why was the cat so small?
Ethan: I have no idea.
Nathan: It ate only condensed milk!

Submitted by Nathan B., Carrollton, Ga.

Caleb: What does Christmas have to do with a cat lost in the desert?
Ben: Beats me.
Caleb: They both have sandy claws.

Submitted by Joshua H., Seminole, Fla.

Comic by Bob Vojtko

Tony: Where do cats write down their notes?
Joannie: I dunno.
Tony: On scratch paper!

Submitted by Tony Z., Orange Park, Fla.

Matt: What do you call a very poor cat?
Kate: No idea. What?
Matt: A “paw-purr.”

Submitted by Matthew D., The Colony, Tex.

Comic by Scott Nickel

Jeremy: What do you call a cat that gives up?
Drew: Tell me.
Jeremy: A “quitty.”

Submitted by Jeremy H., Greensboro, N.C.

Taylor: Why was the cat afraid of the tree?
Jake: Tell me.
Taylor: Because of its bark!

Submitted by Taylor P., McCalla, Ala.

Comic by Scott Masear

Dwight: What does a mouse weigh on a cat’s scale?
Dakota: I don’t know. What?
Dwight: About three pounces!

Submitted by Dwight G., York, Pa.

Daffy: What’s worse than raining cats and dogs?
Taffi: What?
Daffy: Hailing taxis!

Submitted by Erik E., East Lansing, Mich.

Comic by Thomas Toons

Max: What do you call a kitten drinking lemonade?
Matt: I haven’t a clue.
Max: A “sourpuss.”

Cat joke submitted by Max J., Norcross, Ga.

Jake: What happened to the cat that ate the ball of yarn?
Flake: What?
Jake: It had mittens!

Submitted by Jacob V., Scappoose, Ore.

Comic by Harley Schwadron

A young boy felt bad after he accidentally let the neighbor’s cat get loose. After two weeks, the missing cat seemed to be gone for good.

“I’m very sorry,” the boy told the neighbor.

“I’d like to replace it for you.”

“O.K.,” the neighbor said. “How good are you at catching mice?”

Submitted by Tyler R., Medina, Ohio

Evan: What did the cat say when the mouse got away?
Stefan: What?
Evan: “You’ve got to be kitten me!”

Submitted by Evan L., Perrysburg, Ohio.

Comic by Bob Vojtko

Austin: What is a dog’s favorite car to chase?
Elyse: I don’t know. What?
Austin: A CATillac!

Submitted by Austin F., Marysville, Wash.

Zach: What’s smarter than a talking cat?
Jack: What?
Zach: A spelling bee.

Submitted by Zachary S., Lexington, Ky.

Comic by Harley Schwadron

A book never written: “A Guide to Better Cat Care” by Claude Badly.

Submitted by Ryan W., York Springs, Pa.

Devan: Why did the spotted cat get disqualified from the race?
Evan: Why?
Devan: It was a cheetah.

Submitted by Devan T., Shawnee, Kan.

Comic by Scott Nickel

Michael: What do you call a swimming feline?
Pat: I don’t know.
Michael: A “catfish.”

Cat joke submitted by Michael L., Stockton, Calif.

A mother mouse and a baby mouse are walking along when suddenly a cat attacks them. The mother mouse shouts “BARK!” and the cat runs away. “See?” the mother mouse says to her baby. “Now do you see why it’s important to learn a foreign language?”

Submitted by William E., Morganton, N.C.

Comic by ThomasToons

Christian: What’s a cat’s favorite treat?
Eli: What?
Christian: Mice-crispies.

Submitted by Christian O., Red Wing, Minnesota

Ryen: What is the difference between a cat and a comma?
Bill: Tell me.
Ryen: One has claws at the end of its paws, and the other is a pause at the end of a clause.

Submitted by Ryen H., Wenatchee, Washington