Ho! Ho! Ho! Laugh at 100 Funny Christmas Jokes and Comics
Happy Holidays! Count down the days until December 25th with these very funny kid’s Christmas jokes sent in by Scout Life readers. We guarantee this clean holiday humor will help you “ho ho ho” like a certain jolly old elf.
Do you know a funny Christmas joke? Click here to send it to us.
Comic by Daryll Collins
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Caroline: What happens when Santa Claus gets stuck in a chimney?
Jill: Tell me.
Caroline: He gets Claustrophobia!
Joke submitted by Caroline V., Castle Rock, Colo.
Drake: You find it in December but not in any other month. What is it?
Gina: I don’t know.
Drake: The letter D!
Joke submitted by Drake L., Charlotte, N.C.
Comic by Scott Nickel
Maggie: What is the most dangerous kind of body part?
Sara: I don’t know.
Maggie: Mistletoes.
Joke submitted by Maggie S., Madison, Wis.
Comic by Scott Nickel
Zachary: Which of Santa’s reindeer are dinosaurs afraid of?
Lee: No idea.
Zachary: Comet!
Joke submitted by Zachary A., Miami, Fla.
Comic by Scott Nickel
Ricky: What is a snowman’s favorite snack?
Zoey: I don’t know.
Ricky: Ice crispy treats.
Joke submitted by Ricky M., Atlanta, Ga.
Comic by Scott Nickel
Henry: What did one gingerbread man say after all the others were eaten?
Lauren: I haven’t the foggiest.
Henry: “It’s hard to bake new friends.”
Joke submitted by Henry P., Portland, Ore.
Comic by Scott Nickel
Tom Swifty: “I wish I’d never come to the North Pole,” Tom said coldly.
Joke submitted by Owen B., Maplewood, N.J.
Comic by Jon Carter
Young: What do tigers sing at Christmas?
Chris: I’m stumped.
Young: “Jungle Bells!”
Joke submitted by Young L., Chicago, Ill.
Comic by Daryll Collins
Carter: What do elves do in school?
Miley: What?
Carter: Presentations!
Joke submitted by Carter A., Waterloo, Ill.
Arjun: What do you call a snowman with a six pack?
Alexander: I haven’t the foggiest.
Arjun: An abdominal snowman.
Joke submitted by Arjun S., Dover, Del.
Comic by Scott Nickel
Nathaniel: What do you call Santa Claus with unfolded clothes?
Tyler: I don’t know. What?
Nathaniel: Kris Wrinkle.
Joke submitted by Nathaniel C., Manhattan, Kan.
John: What did the gingerbread man put on his bed?
Zack: What?
John: A cookie sheet.
Joke submitted by John D., Johnstown, Penn.
Comics by Thomastoons
Suiyao: Who is Santa’s favorite singer?
David: I don’t know.
Suiyao: Elf-is Presley!
Joke submitted by Suiyao L., Portland, Ore.
Ben: What did the peanut butter say to the grape on Christmas?
Jack: I don’t know.
Ben: “‘Tis the season to be jelly.”
Joke submitted by Ben G., Bethlehem, Penn.
Comic by Scott Nickel
Isaac: What is the Grinch’s favorite holiday?
Anthony: I don’t know.
Isaac: Grinchmas!
Joke submitted by Isaac M., Herndon, Va.
Jeremy: What do you get when you cross a snowman with a vampire?
Brian: I’m stumped.
Jeremy: Frostbite!
Joke submitted by Jeremy B., Lynchburg, Ohio
Comic by Scott Nickel
Donald: What’s Pedro’s favorite part of Christmas?
Will: What?
Donald: Elfalfa milkshakes!
Joke submitted by Donald G., Columbia, S.C.
Peter: Someone must be mad at Frosty the Snowman.
Isaiah: Why?
Peter: Because they gave him two black eyes.
Joke submitted by Peter W., Chetek, Wisc.
Comic by Scott Nickel
Sean: Knock, knock.
Fawn: Who’s there?
Sean: Murray.
Fawn: Murray who?
Sean: Murray Christmas, one and all!
Joke submitted by Sean H., Farmington, N.M.
One night a Viking named Rudolph the Red was looking out the window when he said, “It’s going to rain.”
His wife asked, “How do you know?”
“Because Rudolph the Red knows rain, dear.”
Joke submitted by Jorgen R., Prunedale, Calif.
Comic by Scott Nickel
Caleb: What does Christmas have to do with a cat lost in the desert?
Ben: Beats me.
Caleb: They both have sandy claws.
Joke submitted by Joshua H., Seminole, Fla.
Laure: Why do mummies like the holidays so much?
Benny: Why?
Laure: They’re into all the wrapping.
Joke submitted by Bill G., Davis, Calif.
Comic by Scott Nickel
Will: What’s a good time for Santa to come down the chimney?
Bill: What?
Will: Anytime!
Joke submitted by Keith G., Forestdale, Mass.
Killian: Knock, knock.
Gary: Who’s there?
Killian: Pizza.
Gary: Pizza, who?
Killian: Pizza on earth, good will toward men!
Joke submitted by Killian L., Greensburg, Pa.
Comic by Scott Nickel
Noah: What is a bird’s favorite Christmas story?
Mike: I haven’t a clue.
Noah: The Finch Who Stole Christmas.
Joke submitted by Noah B., Port Deposit, Md.
Rylan: What does a grumpy sheep say at Christmas?
Ryan: What?
Rylan: “Baaaa humbug!”
Joke submitted by Rylan M., Milwaukee, Wisc.
Comic by Scott Nickel
Casen: What do you call a shark that delivers toys at Christmas?
Austin: I’m stumped.
Casen: “Santa Jaws!”
Joke submitted by Casen S., Tyler, Tex.
Will: Where do snowmen keep their money?
Bill: Beats me.
Will: In a snow bank.
Joke submitted by Will M., Big Canoe, Ga.
Comic by Scott Nickel
Bill: Why are Christmas trees so fond of the past?
Laura: Why?
Bill: Because the present’s beneath them.
Joke submitted by Bill G., Davis, Calif.
Sister: What are you giving Mom and Dad for Christmas?
Brother: A list of everything I want!
Joke submitted by Calvin L., Orlando, Fla.
Comic by Scott Nickel
Tim: Did you know Santa had only eight reindeer last Christmas?
Jim: Huh?
Tim: Comet stayed home to clean the sink.
Joke submitted by Tim S., Merriam, Kan.
Chris: What do snowmen like to do on the weekend?
Chrissy: What?
Chris: Chill out.
Joke submitted by Christopher H., Fair Oaks, Calif.
Comic by Scott Nickel
A book never written: “Joyful Occasions” by Holly Daze.
Joke submitted by Matthew H., Northridge, Calif.
Josh: What does Jack Frost like best about school?
John: What?
Josh: Snow and tell.
Joke submitted by Joshua S., Lafayette, Ind.
Comic by Scott Nickel
Zoey: What do you get if you cross an iPad with a Christmas tree?
Johnny: I don’t know. What?
Zoey: A pineapple!
Joke submitted by Zoey Y., Flower Mound, Tex.
A book never written: “How to Decorate a Tree” by Orna Ment.
Joke submitted by Justin L., Galena, Ohio
Comic by Scott Nickel
Moe: What are you going to give your little brother for Christmas this year?
Joe: I haven’t decided yet.
Moe: What did you give him last year?
Joe: The measles.
Joke submitted by Suzan L. W., Spring Hill, Fla.
Pedro: What has a jolly laugh, brings you presents and scratches up your furniture?
Ordep: Beats me. What?
Pedro: Santa Claws.
Joke submitted by Will M., Big Canoe, Ga.
Comic by Scott Nickel
Jacob: What do road crews use at the North Pole?
Jason: I don’t know.
Jacob: Snow cones!
Joke submitted by Ashwin B., Morris Plains, N.J.
Travis: Where do polar bears vote?
Anthony: Where?
Travis: The North Poll!
Joke submitted by Travis S., Alta Loma, Calif.
Comic by Scott Nickel
Teacher: Johnny, define claustrophobia.
Johnny: Fear of Santa Claus?
Joke submitted by Ronesha M., Allen, Tex.
Santa: Knock, knock.
Elf: Who’s there?
Santa: Olive.
Elf: Olive, who?
Santa: Olive the other reindeer.
Joke submitted by Joe R., Saint Charles, Mo.
Comic by Thomas Toons
Luke: What do elves do after school?
Jeffrey: I don’t know. What?
Luke: Their gnome work!
Joke submitted by Luke C., Somers, N.Y.
Chance: Why did Rudolph get a bad report card?
Nate: Why?
Chance: Because he went down in history.
Joke submitted by Chance L., Larchmont, New York
Comic by Scott Nickel
Joe: What nationality is Santa Claus?
Moe: What?
Joe: North Polish.
Joke submitted by Joe B., Huntersville, N.C.
Amanda: What’s the difference between Santa’s reindeer and a knight?
Robert: What?
Amanda: One slays the dragon, and the other’s draggin’ the sleigh.
Joke submitted by Amanda M., Springfield, Mo.
Comic by Scott Nickel
Wayne: How much did Santa’s sleigh cost?
Crystal: I’m stumped.
Wayne: Nothing. It was on the house!
Joke submitted by Wayne T., Xenia, Ohio
Daniel: What do fish sing during winter?
Josh: What?
Daniel: Christmas corals.
Joke submitted by Daniel L., Durham, North Carolina
Comic by Jon Carter
Darth Vader: I know what you’re getting for Christmas.
Luke: How do you know?
Darth Vader: I can feel your presents.
Joke submitted by Mark R., Barrington, R.I.
When asked about his job, Frosty always replies, “There’s no business like snow business.”
Joke submitted by Doug C., Gahanna, Ohio
Comic by Scott Nickel
Steve: What is a Christmas tree’s favorite candy?
Tim: Not sure.
Steve: Ornamints.
Joke submitted by Steve A., Austin, Texas
Warped Wiseman wonders: “Does Santa Claus refer to his elves as ‘subordinate clauses’?”
Joke submitted by Dan H., Conshohocken, Pa.
Comic by Scott Nickel
Josh: Knock, knock!
Samantha: Who’s there?
Josh: Dexter.
Samantha: Dexter, who?
Josh: Dexter halls with boughs of holly.
Joke submitted by Josh B., Dublin, Ohio
Sam: What do you get when you eat Christmas ornaments?
Devin: Not sure.
Sam: Tinsel-itis!
Joke submitted by Sam J., Mona, Utah
Comic by Scott Nickel
Trey: What do you get when you cross a snowman and a dog?
Brandon: I give up.
Trey: Frostbite.
Joke submitted by Trey D., Ringgold, Ga.
Josh: Why was Santa’s little helper depressed?
Mark: Dunno. Why?
Josh: Because he had low elf esteem!
Joke submitted by Dan H., Conshohocken, Pa.
Pedro: What does Santa say at the start of a race?
Pee Wee: I don’t know.
Pedro: “Ready, set, Ho! Ho! Ho!”
Joke submitted by Pedro the Mailburro
Comic by Daryll Collins
Sam: Why do Dasher and Dancer love coffee?
Pam: Why?
Sam: Because they’re Santa’s star bucks!
Joke submitted by Sam P., Merrimack, N.H.
Comic by Scott Nickel
A book never written: “What Did I Do Wrong THIS Year?” by Kole N. Stocking.
Joke submitted by Kole N., Amherst, N.H.
Andrew: What did the pepper say on its holiday card?
Luke: I don’t know.
Andrew: “Season’s greetings.”
Joke submitted by Andrew T., Allen, Tex.
Comic by Scott Nickel
William: What did one snowman say to the other snowman?
David: What?
William: Do you smell carrots?
Joke submitted by William W., Shapleigh, Me.
Comic by Scott Nickel
Pee Wee: What did the reindeer say to the football player?
Westy: I don’t know.
Pee Wee: “Your Blitzen days are over!”
Joke submitted by Nhan P., Camp Hill, Pa.
Colton: How does a sheep say “Merry Christmas”?
Tammi: How?
Colton: “Fleece Navidad!”
Joke submitted by Colton S., Kansas City, Kan.
Comic by Scott Nickel
DOWNLOAD A FREE POCKET JOKE BOOK!
Print and fold your own pocket joke book, filled with great holiday jokes!
• Download the joke book template (PDF)
• Folding instructions
Do you know a funny Christmas joke? Click here to send it to us.
MOE.I am sewing Santa. JOE.Why? MOE.FOR BREAKING AND ENTERING!
THESE THINGS ARE SOOOOO FUNNY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
ha ha! funny!love em!
i dont get any of them
I totally agree with you. A lot of these jokes are NOT funny.
where they funny? didnt get some number 2 was just obvies happy hoildays – dakota
hahahahahahaha
Ha ha ha ha ha ha very funny
ok this just made my day!! i really lover them!! Thank-You to who every made all of these jokes!!c(: n have a merry good Christmas and happy new year!!!
bye!! c(=
worst joke in the world
those are so bunny
the jokse s are funny 🙂
some of these will make my school laugh
these jokes are great for the christmas crackers im making! thing is some of them arent very christmasy. but there good 🙂
WoW! these Jokes are like amazing! i really like them! The jokes just made my day!!
Thanks for Jokes who ever made them!! [:
make more plese thier so hilasru ok
groan…
funny
lol.nise
So funny but I do. not when you cross a christmas tree and a ipad Ido not underds the answer.
THESE MAKE MY DAY GREAT.
heyyy these are sooo funny
idk wat to say really , but main thing is don’t get it u guys who say hahaha thts awsome! i mean very few r funny, but cum’on ya’ll 🙁
they are alright i suppose but didn’t make me laugh but it made my daughter laugh!
some i dont get, but some are the LOL jokes !!!! 🙂 thanks :):):)
joke 7 is awesome
These jokes made my day, and my friends find them funny here in high school for those that are 10th Graders!!! Thank you!
I liked the one about Rudolph the Red because Jorgen used rain,dear instead of reindeer.
These are funny I have to admit. 😛
nice
they are all funny
i dont get the second joke or the seventh joke.
i agree with you dude joke number 2 and 7 don’t make sense.
Yeah I agree I don’t get number 2 and 7 but some were really funny
For #7 What do you get if you cross a tree with an ipad its a pineapple because chrismas trees are PINE trees and an ipad is made by APPLE so if u combine them you get PINE APPLE
#2 they are simply saying that they would like it if santa came with presents sll the time
I don’t agree.
to funny i love em
they are absaloutly amazin! best jokes EVER! merry xmas every1 and a happy new year!
HA HA HA!! SO FUNNY!
so funny
yeah!!! it’s funny….
Tell me more guys
good jokes but some of them are a little lame
YOU ARE TOTALLY RIGHT
I like the 7th and 8th ones best!!!! 🙂
I like all of them, but the “Star Wars” one was my favorite!
i didnt get it
in the Star wars movie Darth Vader tells Luke ” can feel your presence” presents,presence get it?
sweet
these are absolutely AWESOME!!
i like the viking one and the Darth Vader one
A little early, but I love these wonderful Christmas jokes!
awsome jokes
These were hillarious! BEST jokes ever!!!!!
These are great! Today’s is the best of them all, though. I wish everyone a laugh, a (very) merry Christmas, and a happy New year!
AWESOME!!!! can’t wait to here the one on christmas!
Dec 11
Plus I am Your father!!!!! 🙂
Our Pack will be using these for when we visit the Residents in the Masonic home. Our Weeblos especially love doing Run-ons and jokes.
X3
These are hilarious!
LOVE THESE!! I will share them with all of my school aged day care Children. Thank you for adding some joy to our days.
Blessings & Joy!