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30 Funny Back-To-School Jokes

Summer vacation is over, and that’s no laughing matter. But you can go back to the classroom with a smile on your face, thanks to these funny jokes about school sent in by Boys’ Life readers. Do you know a funny joke? Click here to send it to us.


Luke comes home from his first day of school, and his mother asks, “What did you learn today?”

“Not enough,” Luke replies. “They said I have to go back tomorrow.”

Submitted by Luke C., Somers, N.Y.

Nate: Why was school easier for cave people?
Kate: Why?
Nate: Because there was no history to study!

Submitted by Nathaniel R., Glendale, Wis.

A book never written: “The Best Subject in School” by Jim Class.

Submitted by Ian B., Howell, N.J.

David: Why did the broom get a poor grade in school?
Dan: I don’t know. Why?
David: Because it was always sweeping during class!

Submitted by David L., Hicksville, N.Y.

Comic by Scott Nickel

Luke: Why did the M&M go to school?
Stan: I’m stumped.
Luke: Because he really wanted to be a Smartie!

Submitted by Luke C., Somers, N.Y.

Chad: Why do magicians do so well in school?
Josh: I don’t know. Why?
Chad: They’re good at trick questions.

Submitted by Chad N., Firestone, Colo.

Jacob: Why was the teacher wearing sunglasses to school?
Leonard: Why?
Jacob: She had bright students!

Submitted by Jacob B., South Bend, Ind.

A book never written: “High School Math” by Cal Q. Luss.

Submitted by Josh A., Los Angeles, Calif.

A book never written: “When Does School Start?” by Wendy Belrings.

Submitted by Alex M., Ashland, Mass.

Joe: What’s the king of all school supplies?
Moe: I don’t know. What?
Joe: The ruler.

Submitted by Connor B., Metairie, La.

Tom Swiftie: “We have too many quizzes in school!” Tom said testily.

Submitted by Brian C., Snohomish, Wash.

Teacher: Class, we will have only half a day of school this morning.
Class: Hooray!
Teacher: We will have the other half this afternoon.

Submitted by Kyle S., Chesapeake, Va.

Stevie: Hey, Mom, I got a hundred in school today!
Mom: That’s great. What in?
Stevie: A 40 in Reading and a 60 in Spelling.

Submitted by Zachary D. G., Rutherford, N.J.

Hunter: What has given Mr. Bubbles nightmares since elementary school?
Josh: Beats me.
Hunter: Pop quizzes!

Submitted by Sean G., Kailua, Hawaii

What kind of school do you go to if you’re…
…an ice cream man? Sundae school.
…a giant? High school.
…a surfer? Boarding school.
…King Arthur? Knight school.

Submitted by Ryan K., North Platte, Neb.

Mom: What did you do at school today?
Mark: We did a guessing game.
Mom: But I thought you were having a math exam.
Mark: That’s right!

Submitted by Adam P., Wichita, Kan.

Teacher: Donald, what is the chemical formula for water?
Donald: H-I-J-K-L-M-N-O.
Teacher: What are you talking about?
Donald: Yesterday you said it was H to O.

Submitted by Caleb R., Jackson, Mich.

Teacher: Daniel, I’ve had to send you to the principal every day this week. What do you have to say for yourself?
Daniel: I’m glad it’s Friday!

Submitted by Martin R., Belmont, Mass.

Phil: What makes a Cyclops such an effective teacher?
Cheryl: I don’t know.
Phil: He has only one pupil.

Submitted by Colin C., Kansas City, Mo.

Teacher: Where are the Great Plains located?
Tommy: At the great airports!

Submitted by Nicholas G., South Range, Wis.

Teacher: If you had 13 apples, 12 grapes, 3 pineapples and 3 strawberries, what would you have?
Billy: A delicious fruit salad.

Submitted by Harry B., Longmeadow, Mass.

Math teacher: A man from Los Angeles drove toward New York at 250 miles per hour and a man from New York drove toward Los Angeles at 150 m.p.h. Where did they meet?
Johnny: In jail!

Submitted by Glenn J., Santa Ana, Calif.

Teacher: Tommy, can you tell us where the Declaration of Independence was signed?
Tommy: Yes, ma’am. At the bottom.

Submitted by Luke M., Morganton, N.C.

Jordan: My teacher says I have to write more clearly.
Mom: That’s a good idea, Jordan.
Jordan: No, it’s not. Then she’ll know I can’t spell.

Submitted by Jordan R., Nashville, Tenn.

Peter: What’s the difference between a teacher and a train?
Ted: What?
Peter: A teacher says, “Spit out that gum!” and a train says, “Chew! Chew!”

Submitted by Ted S., Lisle, Ill.

Teacher: Can anyone give me a sentence with a direct object?
Student: You are pretty.
Teacher: What’s the direct object?
Student: A good report card.

Submitted by Samuel E., Coweta, Okla.

Teacher: Why can’t you work in an orange juice factory?
Student: I don’t know. Why?
Teacher: Because you can’t concentrate!

Submitted by Caleb S., Mount Vernon, Mo.

Johnny: Teacher, would you punish me for something I didn’t do?
Teacher: Of course not.
Johnny: Good, because I didn’t do my homework.

Submitted by Alex D., Chevy Chase, Md.

John: Knock, knock.
Justin: Who’s there?
John: Gladys.
Justin: Gladys, who?
John: Gladys the weekend—no homework!

Submitted by John S., Farmington, Ga.

Teacher: Why did you eat your homework, Joe?
Joe: Because I don’t have a dog.

Submitted by Austin C., Bowie, Md.

54 Comments on 30 Funny Back-To-School Jokes

  1. Thank you sir! May I have another?

  2. ElephantLover // August 13, 2015 at 11:44 am // Reply


  3. most of the jokes are useless but,still I can use them in my school

  4. YES !!! and would like many more thx

  5. Jokester 2000 // August 5, 2015 at 8:00 am // Reply

    Ha lol really funny!

  6. scout959cool // August 4, 2015 at 11:45 am // Reply

    he he he he i mean ha ha ha !!!!!

  7. I love to read jokes

  8. meg's (Youngster) // July 19, 2015 at 6:20 pm // Reply

    It’s catchy,but not what I had in mind,you could’ve add some more

  9. LOL!!!! in class I can use those!!!!


  10. happy scout // July 16, 2015 at 7:01 pm // Reply

    LOL funny

  11. Too boring

  12. That’s really funny lol

  13. pillow_:) // May 27, 2015 at 9:36 pm // Reply

    really clever and fun! now I can have an excuse for not doing my home work!!!LOL

  14. lol

  15. super funny maybe add some more!!!!😋

  16. Haha so funny This is not being dramatic 😃

  17. So funny

  18. my fav one was the where the guy didnt do his homework (i relate to that)

  19. LOL….

  20. These are not funny so boring :((

  21. Lol awesome

  22. gud jokes really funny

  23. Great jokes


  24. onelesslonelygirl // January 4, 2015 at 9:58 am // Reply

    it was very nice …especially the ruler and the bright students.haha

  25. These jokes are so funny, i dont even get them.. well some of them i do. I almost peed my pants! And laughed for hourssss

  26. Sun glasses are not well

  27. Your jokes make me lol gi gi

  28. Nice jokes!!!!!

  29. Nice jokes

  30. nice jokes…

  31. nice jokes….

  32. your jokes are so funny ha ha ha ha ha ha ha]

  33. It nice joke

  34. they are funny jokes and i like them

  35. That explains why none of my teachers where sunglasses

  36. good jokes

  37. Minecraft 2.0 // October 2, 2014 at 8:42 pm // Reply

    Cool but can you make more LOL.


  39. nice jokes

  40. best one is the sunglasses of the teacher….

  41. lololololol what up? // September 7, 2014 at 12:25 pm // Reply

    really good and funny jokes thx. :-b

  42. These jokes made me laugh so hard that I FELL FROM MY CHAIR!!!

  43. aka Harry Potter // September 1, 2014 at 5:27 pm // Reply

    LOL!!! Nice jokes. These are good ones! 🙂

  44. Hahaha so funny 😀

  45. good jokes guys good for the teachers

  46. HI-larios

  47. Best ones yet. 😀

  48. Best ones yet. 😀

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