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40 Funny Jokes and Comics for Father’s Day

Looking for a hilarious gift idea for Father’s Day? How about telling your dad a joke? Get ready to laugh out loud with this collection of 40 fantastic jokes about dads and fatherhood. These jokes were sent in by Scout Life readers, so you know they’re going to be good.

Whether you want to tickle your dad’s funny bone or make the whole family burst into laughter, these jokes are sure to do the trick. From silly puns to clever one-liners, there’s a joke for every sense of humor. Make this Father’s Day unforgettable with a good dose of laughter and show your dad just how much you appreciate him.

Do you know a funny joke? Click here to send it to us.


Print and fold your own pocket joke book, filled with great Father’s Day jokes!
Download the joke book (PDF)
Folding instructions

Caroline: When does a dad joke become a dad joke?
Jackson: I have no idea.
Caroline: When it becomes apparent.

Submitted by Caroline M., Longview, Tex.

Comic by Van Scott

Jon: What’s the difference between a high-hit baseball and a maggot’s father?
Tom: What?
Jon: One’s a pop fly. The other’s a fly pop.

Submitted by Jon W., Stroudsburg, Pa.

Comic by Scott Nickel

Teacher (on phone): You say Michael has a cold and can’t come to school today? To whom am I speaking?
Voice: This is my father.

Submitted by Mike I., Midland, Mich.

A man is washing his car with his son.

The son asks, “Dad, can’t you just use a sponge?”

Submitted by Andrew S., South Ogden, Utah

Comic by Scott Nickel

Johnny’s father: Let me see your report card.
Johnny: I don’t have it.
Johnny’s father: Why not?
Johnny: My friend just borrowed it. He wants to scare his parents.

Submitted by Tyler H., Blacklick, Ohio

Conner: Who is Little Caesar’s dad?
Zack: I don’t know. Who?
Conner: Papa John.

Submitted by Conner P., Herndon, Virginia

Comic by ThomasToons

“Dad, are bugs good to eat?” asked the boy.

“Let’s not talk about such things at the dinner table, son,” his father replied.

After dinner the father inquired, “Now, son, what did you want to ask me?”

“Oh, nothing,” the boy said. “There was a bug in your soup, but now it’s gone.”

Submitted by Mark Y., Glendora, Calif.

Max: Why is a giraffe such a good father?
Ed: Why?
Max: Because he is someone you can look up to!

Submitted by Max S., Tacoma, Wash.

Comic by Scott Nickel

Timmy: What did the daddy buffalo say to its son before it left for school?
Bob: Beats me.
Timmy: “Bison.”

Submitted by Evan B., Farmington Hills, Mich.

Teacher: If you had $1 and you asked your father for another, how many dollars would you have?
Baylor: One.
Teacher: You don’t know your arithmetic.
Baylor: You don’t know my father.

Submitted by Taylor T., Eden, North Carolina

Comic by Scott Masear

A small boy was at the zoo with his father.  They were looking at the tigers, and his father was telling him how ferocious they were.

“Daddy, if the tigers got out and ate you up…”

“Yes, son?” the father asked, ready to console him.

“…Which bus would I take home?”

Submitted by Gholson D. G., Gaithersburg, Md.

Amy: What did the tree stump say to the newspaper?
Megan: I haven’t the slightest idea.
Amy: “I am your father.”

Submitted by Amy S., Cross Plains, Wis.

Comic by Jon Carter

The teacher asked little Johnny if he knew his numbers.

“Yes,” he said. “My father taught me.”

“Good. What comes after three?”

“Four,” answered the boy.

“What comes after six?”


“Very good,” said the teacher. “Your dad did a good job. And what comes after 10?”


Submitted by Christopher P., Long Beach, Calif.

Science teacher: When is the boiling point reached?
Science student: When my father sees my report card!

Submitted by Michael H., Canton, Ohio

Comic by Scott Nickel

Erin: What did the mother bullet say to the daddy bullet?
Fran: What?
Erin: “We’re gonna have a BB!”

Submitted by Erin K., Tallahassee, Fla.

Joe: What does your father do for a living?
Jon: He’s a magician. He performs tricks, like sawing people in half.
Joe: Do you have any brothers or sisters?
Jon: Yep, four half-sisters and a half-brother.

Submitted by Jonathan W., Stroudsburg, Pa.

Comic by Scott Nickel

Four men are in the hospital waiting room because their wives are having babies. A nurse goes up to the first guy and says, “Congratulations! You’re the father of twins.”

“That’s odd,” answers the man. “I work for the Minnesota Twins!”

A nurse says to the second guy, “Congratulations! You’re the father of triplets!”

“That’s weird,” answers the second man. “I work for the 3M company!”

A nurse tells the third man, “Congratulations! You’re the father of quadruplets!”

“That’s strange,” he answers. “I work for the Four Seasons hotel!”

The last man is groaning and banging his head against the wall. “What’s wrong?” the others ask.

“I work for 7 Up!”

Submitted by Daniel C., Urbana, Ill.

A book never written: “Fatherly Advice” by Buck L. Upson.

Submitted by Aaron and Andrew M., Redondo Beach, Calif.

Comic by Scott Nickel

Son: For $20, I’ll be good.
Dad: Oh, yeah?  When I was your age, I was good for nothing.

Submitted by Robby S., Putnam Valley, N.Y.

Pee Wee: What do you call your dad when he falls through the ice?
Westy: Beats me.
Pee Wee: A POPsicle!

Submitted by Philip K., Marshalltown, Iowa

Comic by Scott Nickel

Pee Wee: How is the baby bird like its dad?
Westy: How?
Pee Wee: It’s a chirp off the old block.

Submitted by David D., Guyton, Ga.

Dad: How do you like fourth grade?
Son: It isn’t much fun.
Dad: That’s too bad. It was the best three years of my life!

Submitted by Luke A., Tucson, Ariz.

Comic by Scott Nickel

Son: Dad, do you know the difference between a pack of cookies and a pack of elephants?
Dad: No.
Son: Then it’s a good thing Mom does the grocery shopping!

Submitted by Steven F. II, Naperville, Ill.

Jacob: I have a lot of my dad’s genes.
Dave: Really? I bet they don’t fit.

Submitted by David B., North Muskegon, Mich.

Comic by Jon Carter

Dad: You’ll never amount to anything because you procrastinate.
Son: Oh yeah? Just you wait!

Submitted by Matt A., Bellevue, Neb.

Dan: I made a bad mistake today and gave my dad some soap flakes instead of corn flakes for breakfast.
Jan: Was he mad?
Dan: Yup. He was foaming at the mouth!

Submitted by Daniel R., Dickinson, Tex.

Comic by Thomastoons

Manny: How do you like the drum set you got for your birthday?
Theo: I love it!
Manny: Why?
Theo: Whenever I don’t play it, my dad gives me 10 bucks!

Submitted by Alvin F., Union City, Calif.

Dad: Son, if you keep pulling my hair, you will have to get off my shoulders.
Tiger Cub: But, Dad, I’m just trying to get my gum back!

Submitted by Ken R., Sparta, Mich.

Comic by Scott Nickel

Dear Dad,
$chool i$ great. I’m making lot$ of friend$ and $tudying hard. I $imply can’t think of anything I need, $o ju$t $end me a card, a$ I would love to hear from you.
Love, Your $on

Dear Son,
I kNOw astroNOmy, ecoNOmics and oceaNOgraphy are eNOugh to keep even an hoNOr student busy. Do NOt forget that the pursuit of kNOwledge is a NOble task, and you can never study eNOugh.
Love, Dad

Submitted by Jacob P., Orem, Utah


Print and fold your own pocket joke book, filled with great Father’s Day jokes!
Download the joke book (PDF)
Folding instructions

54 Comments on 40 Funny Jokes and Comics for Father’s Day

  1. I like the la$t one

  2. it was like a jokes journey .

  3. Loved reading

  4. Fiercefive2013 // June 17, 2013 at 8:05 am // Reply

    I thought that the jokes were halarious!!!!! And my personal favorite was the bug one and the hospital one:)

  5. Bahahahaha! We read all of these as adult children with our Father and Mother today after our dinner, and it brought SUCH LAUGHTER and JOY to giggle and “kid around” – just like when we were young!
    That’s what Father’s day was all about here today!
    No drinking, or profanity and these jokes were CLEAN AND FUNNY!
    HOORAY!!! It’s about TIME that we get good laughter over all the crap that’s on the internet these days!!!

  6. CAN'T TOUCH THIS // June 16, 2013 at 5:46 pm // Reply

    I liked the one with the men and nurse cause I am a triplet too!!!!!! My dad would really laugh at that one!

  7. jannie grapgat // June 16, 2013 at 12:29 pm // Reply

    its really funny i love it!

  8. cool beans // June 16, 2013 at 10:24 am // Reply

    i was on the floor laghting at these :O

  9. preciousluv // June 16, 2013 at 10:11 am // Reply

    they will come in handy for my GRANDS TO TELL THERE DADS

  10. These don’t sound like jokes

  11. This jokes are so funny especially the one at hospital”i work for seven up”LOL guys thats great man

  12. its really awesome

  13. genes

  14. Rainbow Flash // June 15, 2013 at 10:22 pm // Reply

    funNy boy

  15. Lol so funny nd i’m going 2 use them 2day in different ways. I like jokes too

  16. aw$omene$$ // June 15, 2013 at 7:37 pm // Reply

    i like the one about the $chool kid and the dad writing the letters in $ecret code$

  17. chummer1010 // June 15, 2013 at 4:30 pm // Reply

    Haha! These are really funny! My favorite was the last one – What my dad would say to that!

  18. The one with the four men and the bug one are the best!!!!

  19. these werent even funny. kinda pathetic

  20. that’s sort of cool.especially that magician one.

  21. I love them all

  22. awesome stuff guys.All were funny;but i liked 7up,dad wears trousers in the house and four men in the Hospital

  23. Sooooo funy i like sooooo much…..

  24. RealFunny... // June 14, 2013 at 9:38 pm // Reply

    These are kind of stupid and cheesy… Thumbs down for me:(

  25. wow!the jokes were awesome.

  26. So funny I like all of them

  27. Very good jokes i
    laughed so hard

  28. love the last one the son is asking for $ and the dad is saying NO

  29. These are awesome fathers day jokes keep them coming

  30. Smelly chloe // June 13, 2013 at 9:10 am // Reply

    Hahaha….but some are not so funny.😒

  31. ha ha ha! those jokes are so funny!

  32. donnawade // June 9, 2013 at 7:59 pm // Reply

    Fun, guffawing jokes~~’tho too many w/”son”~~none w/daughters…boo, hiss.

  33. These are great

  34. This jokes are really funny and silly to me.

  35. Tenderheart0512 // June 7, 2013 at 3:13 pm // Reply

    Hahahaha! Hilarious! Especially the one about the four fathers and the genes (jeans). The are crazy funny!

  36. hellopeeps // June 6, 2013 at 3:24 pm // Reply

    the seven up one and the dear dad one are the funniest.

  37. they are funny man who comes up with that.

  38. i am minecraft man.... // June 6, 2013 at 3:15 pm // Reply

    they are so funny well most of them

  39. I hate them

  40. nice it will heip me a lot on fathers day

  41. U CAN'T TRACE ME // June 4, 2013 at 11:10 pm // Reply

    The 1 w/ the $ sign is so hi-larious.

  42. Python101 // June 3, 2013 at 7:10 pm // Reply

    These are awesome jokes. If any people out there that wrote these, you’re awesome!!!

  43. StarWarsNerd // June 1, 2013 at 10:24 am // Reply

    I love the 7-Up one!!!!!!!! SO FUNNY!!!!!!!!!!!!

  44. The popsicle one is funniest! 😀

  45. m1a1 abram // May 31, 2013 at 7:06 pm // Reply

    these are awesome
    especially the one about four fathers at the hospital

  46. im the joker in my house and these jokes are garanted to crack him up.

  47. Awe$ome Luke // May 29, 2013 at 6:28 pm // Reply

    I laughed at all of them

  48. These are funny and awesome man!!!!!

  49. SOOOOOOOO FUNNY!!!!!!!

  50. I'm with stupid // May 28, 2013 at 4:48 pm // Reply

    These are so funny! Ecspeicaly science teacher: when is the boiling point reached? science student: when my dad reads my report card!

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