40 Funny Jokes and Comics for Father’s Day

Looking for a hilarious gift idea for Father’s Day? How about telling your dad a joke? Get ready to laugh out loud with this collection of 40 fantastic jokes about dads and fatherhood. These jokes were sent in by Scout Life readers, so you know they’re going to be good.

Whether you want to tickle your dad’s funny bone or make the whole family burst into laughter, these jokes are sure to do the trick. From silly puns to clever one-liners, there’s a joke for every sense of humor. Make this Father’s Day unforgettable with a good dose of laughter and show your dad just how much you appreciate him.

Do you know a funny joke? Click here to send it to us.

DOWNLOAD A FREE POCKET JOKE BOOK!

Print and fold your own pocket joke book, filled with great Father’s Day jokes!
• Download the joke book (PDF)
• Folding instructions

Caroline: When does a dad joke become a dad joke?
Jackson: I have no idea.
Caroline: When it becomes apparent.

Submitted by Caroline M., Longview, Tex.

Comic by Van Scott

Jon: What’s the difference between a high-hit baseball and a maggot’s father?
Tom: What?
Jon: One’s a pop fly. The other’s a fly pop.

Submitted by Jon W., Stroudsburg, Pa.

Comic by Scott Nickel

Teacher (on phone): You say Michael has a cold and can’t come to school today? To whom am I speaking?
Voice: This is my father.

Submitted by Mike I., Midland, Mich.

A man is washing his car with his son.

The son asks, “Dad, can’t you just use a sponge?”

Submitted by Andrew S., South Ogden, Utah

Comic by Scott Nickel

Johnny’s father: Let me see your report card.
Johnny: I don’t have it.
Johnny’s father: Why not?
Johnny: My friend just borrowed it. He wants to scare his parents.

Submitted by Tyler H., Blacklick, Ohio

Conner: Who is Little Caesar’s dad?
Zack: I don’t know. Who?
Conner: Papa John.

Submitted by Conner P., Herndon, Virginia

Comic by ThomasToons

“Dad, are bugs good to eat?” asked the boy.

“Let’s not talk about such things at the dinner table, son,” his father replied.

After dinner the father inquired, “Now, son, what did you want to ask me?”

“Oh, nothing,” the boy said. “There was a bug in your soup, but now it’s gone.”

Submitted by Mark Y., Glendora, Calif.

Max: Why is a giraffe such a good father?
Ed: Why?
Max: Because he is someone you can look up to!

Submitted by Max S., Tacoma, Wash.

Comic by Scott Nickel

Timmy: What did the daddy buffalo say to its son before it left for school?
Bob: Beats me.
Timmy: “Bison.”

Submitted by Evan B., Farmington Hills, Mich.

Teacher: If you had $1 and you asked your father for another, how many dollars would you have?
Baylor: One.
Teacher: You don’t know your arithmetic.
Baylor: You don’t know my father.

Submitted by Taylor T., Eden, North Carolina

Comic by Scott Masear

A small boy was at the zoo with his father.  They were looking at the tigers, and his father was telling him how ferocious they were.

“Daddy, if the tigers got out and ate you up…”

“Yes, son?” the father asked, ready to console him.

“…Which bus would I take home?”

Submitted by Gholson D. G., Gaithersburg, Md.

Amy: What did the tree stump say to the newspaper?
Megan: I haven’t the slightest idea.
Amy: “I am your father.”

Submitted by Amy S., Cross Plains, Wis.

Comic by Jon Carter

The teacher asked little Johnny if he knew his numbers.

“Yes,” he said. “My father taught me.”

“Good. What comes after three?”

“Four,” answered the boy.

“What comes after six?”

“Seven.”

“Very good,” said the teacher. “Your dad did a good job. And what comes after 10?”

“Jack.”

Submitted by Christopher P., Long Beach, Calif.

Science teacher: When is the boiling point reached?
Science student: When my father sees my report card!

Submitted by Michael H., Canton, Ohio

Comic by Scott Nickel

Erin: What did the mother bullet say to the daddy bullet?
Fran: What?
Erin: “We’re gonna have a BB!”

Submitted by Erin K., Tallahassee, Fla.

Joe: What does your father do for a living?
Jon: He’s a magician. He performs tricks, like sawing people in half.
Joe: Do you have any brothers or sisters?
Jon: Yep, four half-sisters and a half-brother.

Submitted by Jonathan W., Stroudsburg, Pa.

Comic by Scott Nickel

Four men are in the hospital waiting room because their wives are having babies. A nurse goes up to the first guy and says, “Congratulations! You’re the father of twins.”

“That’s odd,” answers the man. “I work for the Minnesota Twins!”

A nurse says to the second guy, “Congratulations! You’re the father of triplets!”

“That’s weird,” answers the second man. “I work for the 3M company!”

A nurse tells the third man, “Congratulations! You’re the father of quadruplets!”

“That’s strange,” he answers. “I work for the Four Seasons hotel!”

The last man is groaning and banging his head against the wall. “What’s wrong?” the others ask.

“I work for 7 Up!”

Submitted by Daniel C., Urbana, Ill.

A book never written: “Fatherly Advice” by Buck L. Upson.

Submitted by Aaron and Andrew M., Redondo Beach, Calif.

Comic by Scott Nickel

Son: For $20, I’ll be good.
Dad: Oh, yeah?  When I was your age, I was good for nothing.

Submitted by Robby S., Putnam Valley, N.Y.

Pee Wee: What do you call your dad when he falls through the ice?
Westy: Beats me.
Pee Wee: A POPsicle!

Submitted by Philip K., Marshalltown, Iowa

Comic by Scott Nickel

Pee Wee: How is the baby bird like its dad?
Westy: How?
Pee Wee: It’s a chirp off the old block.

Submitted by David D., Guyton, Ga.

Dad: How do you like fourth grade?
Son: It isn’t much fun.
Dad: That’s too bad. It was the best three years of my life!

Submitted by Luke A., Tucson, Ariz.

Comic by Scott Nickel

Son: Dad, do you know the difference between a pack of cookies and a pack of elephants?
Dad: No.
Son: Then it’s a good thing Mom does the grocery shopping!

Submitted by Steven F. II, Naperville, Ill.

Jacob: I have a lot of my dad’s genes.
Dave: Really? I bet they don’t fit.

Submitted by David B., North Muskegon, Mich.

Comic by Jon Carter

Dad: You’ll never amount to anything because you procrastinate.
Son: Oh yeah? Just you wait!

Submitted by Matt A., Bellevue, Neb.

Dan: I made a bad mistake today and gave my dad some soap flakes instead of corn flakes for breakfast.
Jan: Was he mad?
Dan: Yup. He was foaming at the mouth!

Submitted by Daniel R., Dickinson, Tex.

Comic by Thomastoons

Manny: How do you like the drum set you got for your birthday?
Theo: I love it!
Manny: Why?
Theo: Whenever I don’t play it, my dad gives me 10 bucks!

Submitted by Alvin F., Union City, Calif.

Dad: Son, if you keep pulling my hair, you will have to get off my shoulders.
Tiger Cub: But, Dad, I’m just trying to get my gum back!

Submitted by Ken R., Sparta, Mich.

Comic by Scott Nickel

Dear Dad,
$chool i$ great. I’m making lot$ of friend$ and $tudying hard. I $imply can’t think of anything I need, $o ju$t $end me a card, a$ I would love to hear from you.
Love, Your $on

Dear Son,
I kNOw astroNOmy, ecoNOmics and oceaNOgraphy are eNOugh to keep even an hoNOr student busy. Do NOt forget that the pursuit of kNOwledge is a NOble task, and you can never study eNOugh.
Love, Dad

Submitted by Jacob P., Orem, Utah

DOWNLOAD A FREE POCKET JOKE BOOK!

Print and fold your own pocket joke book, filled with great Father’s Day jokes!
• Download the joke book (PDF)
• Folding instructions