30 Funny St. Patrick’s Day Jokes and Comics
Even if you remember to wear green on March 17, you’ll still get a “pinch” of humor from these funny St. Patrick’s Day jokes submitted by Scout Life readers.
Do you know a funny St. Patrick’s Day joke? Click here to send your joke to us.
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Print and fold your own pocket joke book, filled with great St. Patrick’s Day jokes!
• Download the joke book (PDF)
• Folding instructions
Tom: What do you get when you cross a four-leaf clover with poison ivy?
Pee Wee: I don’t know.
Tom: A rash of good luck on St. Patrick’s Day.
Joke submitted by Tommy F., Aberdeen, Md.
Comic by Daryll Collins
Comic by Scott Nickel
Seth: What do you call a fake Irish stone?
Spencer: What?
Seth: A shamrock!
Joke submitted by Seth F., Frederick, Colo.
Comic by Scott Nickel
David: Mom, I met an Irish boy on St. Patrick’s Day.
Mom: Oh, really?
David: No, O’Reilly!
Joke submitted by David K., Shelby Township, Mich.
Comic by Scott Nickel
Katelynn: What did the leprechaun say when the video game ended?
Molly: What?
Katelynn: Game clover!
Joke submitted by Katelynn E., Lexington, Ky.
Comic by Scott Nickel
Joe: Why shouldn’t you iron a four-leaf clover?
Bob: Tell me.
Joe: You might press your luck!
Joke submitted by Eric H., San Diego, Calif.
Sean: What happens if you fall in the Irish Sea on St. Patrick’s Day?
David: No idea.
Sean: You get wet!
Joke submitted by Sean D., Falls Church, Va.
Comic by Scott Nickel
Jack: On what musical instrument did the show-off musician play his St. Patrick’s Day tunes?
Ally: I have no idea.
Jack: On his brag-pipes.
Joke submitted by Jacqueline S., Moline, Ill.
Danni: Knock. Knock.
Izzy: Who’s there?
Danni: Warren.
Izzy: Warren who?
Danni: Warren any green today?
Joke submitted by Danni L., Memphis, Tenn.
Comic by Scott Nickel
Keenan: What do you call leprechauns who collect aluminum cans, used newspapers and plastic bottles?
Liam: What?
Keenan: “Wee-cyclers!”
Joke submitted by Jacqueline S., Moline, Ill.
Tim: How can you tell if a leprechaun likes your joke?
Rob: How?
Tim: He’s Dublin over with laughter!
Joke submitted by Tim S., Biloxi, Miss.
Comic by Scott Nickel
Jon: How can you tell if a potato is not from Ireland?
Sami: Not sure.
Jon: When it’s a French fry.
Joke submitted by Jon J., Redland, Calif.
Ian: Where do leprechauns buy their groceries?
Colin: I don’t know.
Ian: Rainbow Foods!
Joke submitted by Ian C., Minneapolis, Minn.
Comic by Daryll Collins
Peyton: What did the leprechaun say on March 17?
Cody: I dunno.
Peyton: “Irish you a Happy St. Patrick’s Day!”
Joke submitted by Andy K., Perkasie, Pa.
Jamie: Why did St. Patrick drive all the snakes out of Ireland?
Ashley: Why?
Jamie: Airplanes weren’t invented yet.
Joke submitted by Jamie M., Plantation, Fla.
Comic by Scott Nickel
Carrot: Knock, knock.
Potato: Who’s there?
Carrot: Irish stew.
Potato: Irish stew, who?
Carrot: Irish stew in the name of the law.
Joke submitted by J.S., Hayward, Calif.
Mike: What does a leprechaun say when you tell him Bono is his favorite singer?
Misty: Tell me.
Mike: You too?
Joke submitted by Mike M., Omaha, Neb.
Comic by Daryll Collins
Evan: What’s Irish and stays out all night?
Steffan: What?
Evan: Paddy O’Furniture.
Joke submitted by Evan R., Wylie, Tex.
Will: What’s big and purple and lies next to Ireland?
Cody: No clue.
Will: Grape Britain!
Joke submitted by Will C., Laramie, Wyo.
Comic by Scott Nickel
Steph: Why do people wear shamrocks on St. Patrick’s Day?
Jak: Why?
Steph: ‘Cause real rocks are too heavy!
Joke submitted by Steph O., El Paso, Tex.
Alexis: What do you call Dwayne Johnson’s stunt double?
Zack: What?
Alexis: The Sham-Rock!
Joke submitted by Alexis J., Margate, Fla.
Comic by Scott Nickel
Mika: What did the baby leprechaun find at the end of the rainbow?
Will: A pot of gold?
Mika: No, a Potty Gold!
Joke submitted by Mika C., Las Vegas, Nev.
Ella: What did Saint Patrick say when he drove all the snakes out of Ireland?
Bella: I don’t know.
Ella: “Everyone got seat belts on back there?”
Joke submitted by Ella C., Topeka, Kan.
DOWNLOAD A FREE POCKET JOKE BOOK!
Print and fold your own pocket joke book, filled with great St. Patrick’s Day jokes!
• Download the joke book (PDF)
• Folding instructions
Do you know a funny St. Patrick’s Day joke? Click here to send your joke to us.
I love the part in poem.
oh my word they are so funny i dressed up as a lepricaun for halloween and wrote all of them down to tell them to strangers
best jokes
very funny but very interesting
ok
What? I love these
real cool. I want you to make more!
Such funny
i like the jokes i hope you make more
I love these jokes i even used them for my class!~
Love the jokes so funny😍😘❤️😍💕
These jokes cracked me up which made me laugh so hard 😅
it was funny
Thanks for the fun jokes to share with my family. Good happy laughs.
It was funny and cool
Love these jokes
funny
Omg so funny 😂
I don’t know which one to pick for my school newsletter!:😍:)
Love everything! I am pretty Irish (don’t know how much).
Yikes they really need an explanation? Lol
I LOVE THESE JOKES
I get it
these are so funny
I like it really much 👍
I got all the jokes, but i’m 51% Irish!
AWESOME!
the best one was the one with yoda!
I got the last two but it took me awile
HA
cool
I only got two of them
Lol these jokes cracked me up
I love these I got al of them😂😂😂😂
ME either!
These jokes are all worthy of “Boys Life”
.
I thought Paddy O’Furniture was Irish and sits in the sun….
The last two jokes
Irish stew,……………..I arrest you
Paddy O’Furniture………..Patio furniture
YYAAYYY!!!!!!
I don’t understand the last two😮
I did not get them both
took me awhile too but I think…Irish stew………. is supposed to be I ARREST YOU in the name of the law,and paddy O’Furniture is just adding an O to the last name.
Paddy O’Furniture = patio furniture
Me Too!
thank very much
“I arrest you in the name of the law.”
“Patio furniture” is always outside.
These are really funny jokes, I loled for 7 days
Silly