50 Funny Thanksgiving Day Jokes and Comics

By Scout Life readers

Happy Thanksgiving Day! Here’s a plateful of Thanksgiving jokes by Scout Life readers that will make you thankful you have a funny bone instead of a wishbone on Turkey Day. Do you know a funny Thanksgiving joke? Click here to send your joke to us.

Laugh at 6,000+ more funny jokes at jokes.scoutlife.org!

Josh: Why did the farmer run a steamroller over his potato field on Thanksgiving Day?
Phil: Why?
Josh: He wanted to raise mashed potatoes.

Joke submitted by John W., Hoschton, Ga.

Comic by Scott Nickel

Pablo: What material did the turkey use to build a driveway?
Carson: Not a clue.
Pablo: Gobblestones.

Joke submitted by Pablo F., Wake Forest, North Carolina

Comic by Scott Nickel

Cresencio: What sound does a turkey’s phone make?
Amber: What?
Cresencio: “Wing! Wing!”

Joke submitted by Cresencio A., Norwalk, California

Comic by Scott Nickel

Pearl: What do you call a running turkey?
Ally: I haven’t the foggiest.
Pearl: Fast food!

Joke submitted by Pearl C., Rancho Cucamonga, Calif.

Comic by Scott Nickel

Gregory: Why do I think that turkeys might be trolls?
Samuel: No idea.
Gregory: Because they’re always goblin.

Joke submitted by Gregory H., Hammonton, N.J.

Comic by Scott Nickel

Biff: Why did the turkey cross the road?
Bob: I don’t know.
Biff: It was Thanksgiving Day, and he wanted people to think he was a chicken!

Joke submitted by Rachy Y., Waianae, Hawaii

Comic by Scott Nickel

Gabriel: What did one pumpkin say to the other?
Jake: I don’t know.
Gabriel: “That test was as easy as pie.”

Joke submitted by Gabriel S., San Diego, Calif.

Comic by Scott Nickel

Ayn: What animal has the worst eating habits?
Karla: The pig?
Ayn: Nope. The turkey, because it gobbles everything up!

Joke submitted by Ayn A., Pittsburgh, Penn.

Comic by Scott Nickel

Charles: What is a turkey’s favorite dessert?
Mary: I haven’t a clue.
Charles: Peach gobbler!

Joke submitted by Charles S., Gilbert, Ariz.

Comic by Scott Nickel

Cresencio: Why do turkeys eat so little?
Max: I don’t know.
Cresencio: Because they are always stuffed.

Joke submitted by Cresencio A., Norwalk, Calif.

Comic by Scott Nickel

Tom Swiftie: “May I say the prayer before Thanksgiving dinner?” Tom asked gracefully.

Joke submitted by Eric Z., Spokane,Wash.

Comic by Scott Nickel

Kyle: What part of the turkey does a drummer love the most?
Brett: I’m puzzled!
Kyle: The drumsticks.

Joke submitted by Brett B., Manhattan, Kan.

Comic by Scott Nickel

A lady was picking through the frozen turkeys at the grocery store for Thanksgiving Day, but couldn’t find one big enough for her family. She asked a stock boy, “Do these turkeys get any bigger?”

“No, ma’am. They’re dead.”

Joke submitted by Grant W., San Diego, Calif.

Comic by Scott Nickel

Jeremy: What key has legs and can’t open doors?
Sammy: I don’t know.
Jeremy: A turkey.

Joke submitted by Jeremy B., Lynchburg, Ohio

Comic by Scott Nickel

Danny: Why did the cranberries turn red?
Jake: Beats me.
Danny: Because they saw the turkey dressing!

Joke submitted by Danny Z., Sandwich, Mass.

Comic by Scott Nickel

Billy: Why do pilgrims’ pants always fall down?
Joe: Beats me.
Billy: Because they wear their belt buckles on their hats!

Joke submitted by Billy S., Dover, Mass.

Comic by Scott Nickel

Luke: What did the turkey say to the computer?
Will: What?
Luke: “Google, google, google.”

Joke submitted by Luke C., College Station, Tex.

Josh: What do you get when you cross a turkey with a centipede?
David: Tell me.
Josh: Drumsticks for everyone on Thanksgiving Day!

Joke submitted by David B., Quaker Hill, Conn.
Comic by Daryll Collins

Comic by Scott Nickel

A man buys a parrot, only to have it constantly insult him. He tries everything to make the parrot stop, but nothing works. Frustrated, the man puts the parrot in the freezer. After a few minutes the insults stop. The man thinks he might have killed the parrot, so he opens the freezer and takes the parrot out. The parrot is shivering. It stammers, “S-s-sorry for being r-r-rude. Please f-f-forgive me.” Then, after a moment, the parrot softly asks, “W-w-what exactly d-d-did the turkey do?”

Joke submitted by Ted M., Sayreville, N.J.

Comic by Scott Nickel

Jeremy: What smells the best at a Thanksgiving dinner?
Eric: Tell me.
Jeremy: Your nose.

Joke submitted by Jeremy B., Lynchburg, Ohio

Comic by Scott Nickel

Pedro: What did the turkey say to the turkey hunter on Thanksgiving Day?
Ordep: What?
Pedro: “Quack! Quack!”

Joke submitted by Svenju B., Shawnee, Okla.

Comic by Van Scott

Caleb: What key has legs and can’t open doors?
Caitlyn: What?
Caleb: A turkey.

Joke submitted by Caleb M.

Comic by Bill Thomas

Alex: Why did the farmer have to separate the chicken and the turkey?
Adam: Why?
Alex: He sensed fowl play.

Joke submitted by Alex W., Sterling Heights, Mich.

Comic by Daryll Collins

Robert: Which bird is best at bowling?
Chrystal: I don’t know.
Robert: A turkey.

Joke submitted by Nathaniel C., Manhattan, Kan.

Comic by Scott Nickel

Leighton: What sound does a limping turkey make?
Zach: I give up!
Leighton: “Wobble, wobble!”

Joke submitted by Zach C., Roanoke, Tex.

Comic by Scott Nickel

Chas: What kind of music did the Pilgrims listen to at the first Thanksgiving feast?
Tom: What kind?
Chas: Plymouth Rock!

Joke submitted by Chas K., Appleton, Wis.

Comic by Scott Nickel

Sister: Mom wants your to help us fix Thanksgiving Day dinner.
Brother: Why? Is it broken?

Joke submitted by Stephanie R., Chittenango, N.Y.

Comic by Scott Nickel

Pat: What’s the difference between a pirate and a cranberry farmer?
Jerry: I don’t know. What?
Pat: A pirate buries his treasure, but a cranberry farmer treasures his berries.

Joke submitted by Patricia J., Warrens, Wis.