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Laugh at 30 Funny Fourth of July Jokes

Light the funny fuse on your Independence Day celebration with these hilarious Fourth of July jokes from Scout Life readers. Whether you’re grilling burgers, watching fireworks or enjoying quality time with family and friends, these witty one-liners, clever puns and hilarious comics are a perfect way to celebrate the Fourth!

Do you know a funny Fourth of July joke? Click here to send it to us.

Comic by Daryll Collins

Justin: Why does the Statue of Liberty stand in New York Harbor?
Gerald: Why?
Justin: Because she can’t sit down.

Joke by Justin A., Oquawka, Ill.

George: Knock, knock.
Kent: Who’s there?
George: Sadie.
Kent: Sadie, who?
George: Sadie Pledge of Allegiance — it’s the Fourth of July!

Joke by Kent A., Lakewood, Ohio

Alex: Where did our first president keep his mice?
Will: Tell me.
Alex: Mount Vermin!

Joke by Joshua R., Birmingham, Ala.

Comic by Scott A. Masear

Tom Swiftie: “Don’t light those fireworks!” Tom exploded.

Joke by Jeffrey D., Lansing, Mich.

Johnny: Does Europe have a 4th of July?
Josh: No.
Johnny: Yes, it does. It comes right after the 3rd of July.

Joke by Jude P. D., Rayne, La.

Joe: My brother swallowed a box of firecrackers.
Moe: Is he all right now?
Joe: I don’t know. I haven’t heard the last report.

Submitted by Joshua G., Corvallis, Mont.

Comic by Scott Nickel

Nathaniel: What did the parrot say on Independence Day?
Gabriel: Tell me.
Nathaniel: “Polly want a firecracker!”

Joke by Nathaniel H., Arvada, Colo.

Teacher: What did George Washington say to his men before they crossed the Delaware?
Johnny: “Get in the boat, men!”

Joke by Jon M., Central Point, Ore.

A book never written: “American Victories” by Norman D. Beech.

Joke by Ben H., Ontario, N.Y.

Comic by Scott Nickel

Tom Swifty: “I live in America,” Tom stated.

Joke submitted by Evi Vander Z., Pewee Valley, Ky.

Harry: What do you call an American drawing?
John: What?
Harry: Yankee doodle!

Joke by Aubrey T., Jackson, Miss.

Alvin: My great-grandfather fought with Napoleon, my grandfather fought with the French and my father fought with the Americans.
Alex: Your relatives couldn’t get along with anyone, could they?

Joke by Alex I., Exeter, R.I.

Comic by Scott Nickel

Teacher: More than 200 years ago, our forefathers defeated the British in the Revolutionary War.
Caleb: Wow! They must have been pretty strong, four men defeating a whole army!

Joke by Caleb B., Borfield, Ill.

Pedro: What was the patriots’ favorite food in the Revolutionary War?
Ordep: I don’t know. What?
Pedro: Chicken Catch-a-Tory!

Joke by Greg B., Corning, N.Y.

Beth: What did one flag say to the other flag?
Eric: Nothing. It just waved!

Joke by Wyatt P., Sumerduck, Va.

Teacher: Tommy, can you tell us where the Declaration of Independence was signed?
Tommy: Yes, ma’am. At the bottom.

Joke by Luke M., Morganton, N.C.
Comic by Daryll Collins

Ben: How come there’s no knock-knock joke about America?
John: No idea.
Ben: Because freedom rings.

Joke submitted by Ben G., Bethlehem, Penn.

Robert: What’s red, white and blue?
Bradley: Our flag, of course.
Robert: And a sad candy cane!

Joke by Robert D., Rowlett, Tex.

Comic by Scott Nickel

Luke: What do you get when you cross Captain America and The Incredible Hulk?
Dad: What?
Luke: Star-Spangled Banner.

Joke submitted by Luke M., Edison, N.J.

A book never written: “The Parts of the National Anthem” by Homer D. Brave.

Joke by Micheal R., Brewton, Ala.

Teacher: Johnny, what are the last words of “The Star-Spangled Banner”?
Johnny: “Play ball”?

Joke by Nate C., Ipswich, Mass.

Comic by Scott Nickel

Robert: What did the colonists wear to the Boston Tea Party?
John: I don’t know.
Robert: Tea-shirts.

Joke by John D., Richmond, Va.

A book never written: “How to Become President” by Paul O’Ticks.

Joke by Leonard C., San Diego, Calif.

Patrick: What do you call our 16th president, waiting to turn left at a red light?
Hugh: I have no clue.
Patrick: Abe Blinkin.

Joke by Patrick D., Madison, Wis.

12 Comments on Laugh at 30 Funny Fourth of July Jokes

  1. Shin-Chan 6356 // December 18, 2023 at 7:15 am // Reply

    Why does the Statue of Liberty Green?
    Because it paint green in 9163

  2. Hey iron man, You’re liberty ice cream is ready!
    Do you want some ghost pepper too?

  3. Anonymous // July 4, 2022 at 7:38 am // Reply

    Not funny at all…I didn’t even grin.

  4. QWERTYUIOPASDFGHJKLZXCVBNM // June 22, 2022 at 4:57 pm // Reply


  5. owen is cool // July 4, 2020 at 10:16 am // Reply

    this jokes are funny for youtube

  6. Q: What did George Washington say to his men as they rowed across the Delaware River? A: “Don’t ROCK the BOAT!”

  7. Southern Pastor // July 2, 2020 at 9:25 am // Reply

    These were great and I intend to share them. they made me smile. Thanks! Southern Pastor

  8. I like them all

  9. I like them but not the tom swiftys

  10. Snakecharmer // July 5, 2019 at 10:25 am // Reply

    These jokes are so corny

  11. Sonic scourge // July 3, 2019 at 11:53 pm // Reply

    Cute and funny thank you gave me a chuckle

  12. tom swiftie jokes annoy me july 4th one and Boston tea party one

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