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30 Funny Back-To-School Jokes

Summer vacation is over, and that’s no laughing matter. But you can go back to the classroom with a smile on your face, thanks to these funny jokes about school sent in by Boys’ Life readers. Do you know a funny joke? Click here to send it to us.


Luke comes home from his first day of school, and his mother asks, “What did you learn today?”

“Not enough,” Luke replies. “They said I have to go back tomorrow.”

Submitted by Luke C., Somers, N.Y.

Nate: Why was school easier for cave people?
Kate: Why?
Nate: Because there was no history to study!

Submitted by Nathaniel R., Glendale, Wis.

A book never written: “The Best Subject in School” by Jim Class.

Submitted by Ian B., Howell, N.J.

David: Why did the broom get a poor grade in school?
Dan: I don’t know. Why?
David: Because it was always sweeping during class!

Submitted by David L., Hicksville, N.Y.

Comic by Scott Nickel

Luke: Why did the M&M go to school?
Stan: I’m stumped.
Luke: Because he really wanted to be a Smartie!

Submitted by Luke C., Somers, N.Y.

Chad: Why do magicians do so well in school?
Josh: I don’t know. Why?
Chad: They’re good at trick questions.

Submitted by Chad N., Firestone, Colo.

Jacob: Why was the teacher wearing sunglasses to school?
Leonard: Why?
Jacob: She had bright students!

Submitted by Jacob B., South Bend, Ind.

A book never written: “High School Math” by Cal Q. Luss.

Submitted by Josh A., Los Angeles, Calif.

A book never written: “When Does School Start?” by Wendy Belrings.

Submitted by Alex M., Ashland, Mass.

Joe: What’s the king of all school supplies?
Moe: I don’t know. What?
Joe: The ruler.

Submitted by Connor B., Metairie, La.

Tom Swiftie: “We have too many quizzes in school!” Tom said testily.

Submitted by Brian C., Snohomish, Wash.

Teacher: Class, we will have only half a day of school this morning.
Class: Hooray!
Teacher: We will have the other half this afternoon.

Submitted by Kyle S., Chesapeake, Va.

Stevie: Hey, Mom, I got a hundred in school today!
Mom: That’s great. What in?
Stevie: A 40 in Reading and a 60 in Spelling.

Submitted by Zachary D. G., Rutherford, N.J.

Hunter: What has given Mr. Bubbles nightmares since elementary school?
Josh: Beats me.
Hunter: Pop quizzes!

Submitted by Sean G., Kailua, Hawaii

What kind of school do you go to if you’re…
…an ice cream man? Sundae school.
…a giant? High school.
…a surfer? Boarding school.
…King Arthur? Knight school.

Submitted by Ryan K., North Platte, Neb.

Mom: What did you do at school today?
Mark: We did a guessing game.
Mom: But I thought you were having a math exam.
Mark: That’s right!

Submitted by Adam P., Wichita, Kan.

Teacher: Donald, what is the chemical formula for water?
Donald: H-I-J-K-L-M-N-O.
Teacher: What are you talking about?
Donald: Yesterday you said it was H to O.

Submitted by Caleb R., Jackson, Mich.

Teacher: Daniel, I’ve had to send you to the principal every day this week. What do you have to say for yourself?
Daniel: I’m glad it’s Friday!

Submitted by Martin R., Belmont, Mass.

Phil: What makes a Cyclops such an effective teacher?
Cheryl: I don’t know.
Phil: He has only one pupil.

Submitted by Colin C., Kansas City, Mo.

Teacher: Where are the Great Plains located?
Tommy: At the great airports!

Submitted by Nicholas G., South Range, Wis.

Teacher: If you had 13 apples, 12 grapes, 3 pineapples and 3 strawberries, what would you have?
Billy: A delicious fruit salad.

Submitted by Harry B., Longmeadow, Mass.

Math teacher: A man from Los Angeles drove toward New York at 250 miles per hour and a man from New York drove toward Los Angeles at 150 m.p.h. Where did they meet?
Johnny: In jail!

Submitted by Glenn J., Santa Ana, Calif.

Teacher: Tommy, can you tell us where the Declaration of Independence was signed?
Tommy: Yes, ma’am. At the bottom.

Submitted by Luke M., Morganton, N.C.

Jordan: My teacher says I have to write more clearly.
Mom: That’s a good idea, Jordan.
Jordan: No, it’s not. Then she’ll know I can’t spell.

Submitted by Jordan R., Nashville, Tenn.

Peter: What’s the difference between a teacher and a train?
Ted: What?
Peter: A teacher says, “Spit out that gum!” and a train says, “Chew! Chew!”

Submitted by Ted S., Lisle, Ill.

Teacher: Can anyone give me a sentence with a direct object?
Student: You are pretty.
Teacher: What’s the direct object?
Student: A good report card.

Submitted by Samuel E., Coweta, Okla.

Teacher: Why can’t you work in an orange juice factory?
Student: I don’t know. Why?
Teacher: Because you can’t concentrate!

Submitted by Caleb S., Mount Vernon, Mo.

Johnny: Teacher, would you punish me for something I didn’t do?
Teacher: Of course not.
Johnny: Good, because I didn’t do my homework.

Submitted by Alex D., Chevy Chase, Md.

John: Knock, knock.
Justin: Who’s there?
John: Gladys.
Justin: Gladys, who?
John: Gladys the weekend—no homework!

Submitted by John S., Farmington, Ga.

Teacher: Why did you eat your homework, Joe?
Joe: Because I don’t have a dog.

Submitted by Austin C., Bowie, Md.

60 Comments on 30 Funny Back-To-School Jokes

  1. #EVILEAWESOMEMUFFIN!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! // May 24, 2020 at 5:30 am // Reply

    but some of them are TERRIBLE!!!!!!!!!

  2. I have told these jokes to my friends and they love them!
    And at this time they really are.Think you can upload more of them?

  3. Bobby Joe jr (not my real name) // May 18, 2020 at 9:46 am // Reply

    These are really funny jokes! They brightened my day!

  4. Anonymous // May 18, 2020 at 4:34 am // Reply

    Really interesting!

  5. Because of the Covid-19, we are just going back to school

  6. Ok so this is the weirdest but funniest thing I ever heard

  7. The teacher asking student jokes are funny, really great.

  8. I really liked those jokes

  9. Good jokes keep them coming

  10. good jokes

  11. Awesome

  12. 😍😎😋😜 // December 18, 2019 at 9:39 pm // Reply

    make more comics 😣😉

  13. Amazing jokes BTW just 12😇

  14. All these jokes are….just…🤣🤣🤣🤣

  15. I really laughed for the joke that is “ Jonny:would you punish me for something I didn’t do? Teacher:of course,not. Jonny:Good because I didn’t do my homework 😂😂😂😂😂😂😂

  16. Hardy Har

  17. Funny funny soooo funny hi hi hi hooo
    Bla bla bla jokes

  18. Ha Ha Ha

  19. i luv boy scouts

  20. I love minecraft and roblox // August 10, 2019 at 12:16 pm // Reply

    I like the I ones where you don’t ask someone for their answer. (The story ones)

  21. Cool

  22. Nice joke

  23. I think all of these are super funny!

  24. Learner400 // May 13, 2019 at 9:55 am // Reply

    They were kinda cheesy but I enjoyed them.

  25. Cory, Nice

  26. Very bad jokes

  27. 😎 IAM AWESOME // March 26, 2019 at 12:42 pm // Reply


  28. the most hilarious jokes about jokes.

  29. Black butterfly // January 19, 2019 at 11:24 am // Reply

    Funny,gives 9/10

  30. your great

  31. Awesome jokes, please make more so i can use them on my teacher!!!

  32. Awesome jokes!!! make more so i can use them!

  33. I’m homeschooled, so I barely understand the jokes about grades, report cards, et cetera et cetera

  34. Nice …

  35. im am a 16 year old im a sophmore and theses acually made me laugh keep up the good work

  36. those were goo but cheesy

  37. I am only 9 years old so I am still in school and these are hilarious 😂.

  38. The pike market MPs // September 11, 2018 at 12:06 am // Reply

    Wow make more plz

  39. Great jokes…all of them!

  40. PanthersPride // August 27, 2018 at 4:54 pm // Reply

    Teacher: I’ve been teaching this math class for 40 classes and you’re the only ones who haven’t been able to answer this question!

    Student: If you’ve been teaching this class for 40 years shouldn’t you know the answer by now?

  41. I believe i saw these in Grin and Bear it in Boy’s Life 50 or 60 years ago.


  43. YergenFlergen04 // August 10, 2018 at 10:26 pm // Reply

    D is for Diplomat

  44. Mynameisbad // August 3, 2018 at 8:41 pm // Reply

    I need an F that stands for fantastic.

  45. amazing

  46. YoteMaster2000 // July 26, 2018 at 12:08 am // Reply

    not bad… not bad…

  47. swagdowg101 // July 25, 2018 at 8:35 am // Reply

    My sister has a friend that is really funny and would enjoy some of these jokes. Thanks for sharing your jokes!!!

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